Boundaries for Children's Activities

pic taken from powerpoint clip art

When I watched my four-year-old daughter attempt to learn a cartwheel,  I enjoyed taking her to  gymnastics.  I loved the adult conversations with other moms.  We chitchatted about preschools, outings for kids, and what was for dinner.  For my daughter,  she played games with music, jumped on the trampoline, and learned a little gymnastics along the way.

One day I decided to watch my daughter from another room.  There were stairs that led to a whole other world.  A different crowd sat upstairs.  The moms of competitive gymnists.  They talked about the next meet, the lack of time for homework, and stress of cooking meals.  That day I told myself, "We will never do that."  In fact, I didn't want any of my three girls to be thrown into the competitve world in any sport.

But guess what.  Today my seven-year-old daughter is beginning a "competitive league" in gymnastics.  She will now practice two nights a week and compete with her teammates occasionally.  I had no idea a fun gymnastics class would introduce her to her passion.  She's very athletic and has excelled in any sport she's tried. My husband is sad she didn't pick soccer. He's coached her since she was three-years-old. And I would have loved to coach her in basketball.  But she's built like a gymnast.  However, should she compete just because she's talented, we have the money, and she loves it? 

This was my struggle last week.  How busy is too busy?  What are the boundaries for our family with children's activities? We've always had a "one sport rule," which has helped. But when we have three girls, even one sport each can be crazy!  Add piano lessons and church and I'm running children somewhere every day.

I know every family has to make their own boundaries.  How do you decide?  I asked God to help me answer this question, "Do I make a schedule and ask God to help me with it, or do I ask God to help make my schedule?"

You know you are too busy with children's activities (any schedule for that matter) when,

1)  There are more fast food wrappers in the mom-mobile trash than kleenexes.

2)   The kids have to pull dirty soccer socks from the laundry to wear to practice.

3)  The children ask to stay home.

4)  If you are married, you don't have time to "date" your spouse.

5)  If you are married, you only talk to your spouse about kids schedules.

6)  Your prayers with your children consist of protection, rest, and wins.

7)  You need a special calendar to remember all the activities.

8)  A homemade meal is a treat. 

9)  You spend more time in the car shuttling kids than cleaning your house and shopping for
groceries. 

10)  You didn't notice your child has outgrown their clothes.

You may or may not be able to relate to this list.  You may have stricter or more lenient standards. 

One day my children will be gone.  But they will remember our priorities.  How we spend our time, our money, and our words all reflect our priorities.  What will they say were our priorities?

Matthew 6:33  But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 

Are you seeking God's priorities?
What is a good boundary for your family?




Linked to:  Cornerstone Confessions

Taking Time at the Table

Pic from power point clip art.  (I didn't have a pic of our blanket tents.  Maybe next time). 

I love summer time with my girls.  I love the days of "no schedule", getting up late, and frozen waffles.  Today is one of those days.  At the beginning of the summer, I had great intentions of using the summer to study the book of John with the girls.  We had a few good weeks and then our days filled up with friends, swimming, and other excuses.

This morning we decided to continue our study using Jesus in the Spotlight by Kay Arther (Inductive Bible Studies for Kids).  Today we spent extra time at the table after breakfast, John 7.

The girls learned about:

Travel 

My girls love to travel.  We drive our comfortable minivan on road trips.  Actually, they are pretty spoiled.  Sometimes they complain if they don't get to pick out the next DVD to watch.  They eat and drink whatever they choose. 

In our study, when we looked at the map, they discovered Jesus WALKED about 60 miles.  My six-year-old said, "That's dangerous."  Maybe next trip we will be more thankful for our minivan. 

Tents 

When my girls hear the word "tent", they do not think of a camping tent like most.  Like me, they think of the blanket tents that engulf our living room.  I remember making tents with my sisters.  We'd use our chalk boards, kitchen set, and plenty of blankets to make our bedroom into a "full house", with plenty of rooms for all of our dolls.

When the girls learned about the Feast of the Booths in John 7, they remembered their tents.  The Jews celebrate the Feast of the Booths to remember the tents they made when God led the people out of Egypt. They also celebrated the autumn season and its harvest.

Temple

When the girls hear the word "temple", they think of our church building.  Yes, the temple was the place of worship, but very different than our modern churches. 

The girls read about Jesus teaching in the temple. John 7:25- 30 (NASB) ²⁵ So some of the people of Jerusalem were saying, “Is this not the man whom they are seeking to kill? ²⁶ Look, He is speaking publicly, and they are saying nothing to Him. The rulers do not really know that this is the Christ, do they? ²⁷ However, we know where this man is from; but whenever the Christ may come, no one knows where He is from.” ²⁸ Then Jesus cried out in the temple, teaching and saying, “ You both know Me and know where I am from; and I have not come of Myself, but He who sent Me is true, whom you do not know. ²⁹ I know Him, because I am from Him, and He sent Me.” ³⁰ So they were seeking to seize Him; and no man laid his hand on Him, because His hour had not yet come.

This temple visit shows the majority of the Jews didn't know Jesus was the Christ, the Promised One.

What have you learned at "Table Time"?
The next time you build a tent (or your children, or grandchildren), or set up a tent to camp, take the time to tell the story of  how God rescued the Israelites from Egypt (Exodus 11-14).   

  

Learning vs. Living it

HOPE S.H.A.R.E.D. (Share How Abba Relates Every Day)



J after surgery

J before surgery

My daughter, J, had sinus surgery on Monday.  She didn't want to have surgery.  Who would blame her?  It's summer.  She nine years old and wants to play outside (when it's not 100+ degrees like it is this week), go to swim practice, and compete in a swim meet later this week.

I didn't want her to have surgery.  Who likes to watch their daughter "freak out" when getting an iv and almost crying because she has to wait an hour with it hurting her hand?  Or watching her become frustrated with annoying nasal drainage?  No one does.

We want our children to only experience joys, not sorrows; health, not sickness; comfort, not pain; acceptance, not rejection.  We want to same for ourselves.  Don't we?

Then why do we have bad experiences?  Remember, we live in a world where people have chosen their own way, instead of God's way.  Life isn't perfect.  We all suffer the consequences of a fallen world, fallen from perfection. 

God wants to use our daily trials as training ground. 

With trials, we learn to trust God.   

With disappointments, we learn to depend on God. 

With lessons, we not only learn about God, but we live out God's promises. (or at least have the opportunity)

For J, this week is a week of trials, disappointments, and lessons.  She learned about God's awesome power last week in Vacationa Bible School.  This week, she gets to live it out. (or at least try to)  

What is God teaching you through your trial?

Are you only learning about God, or living out God's promises?

Romans 8:28  We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.

P.S.  By the time I finished downloading pics to post this blog, Jadyn feels much better!  She even swam this evening, praise the Lord!

Linked to:  1-Minute Bible Love Notes